Do you believe in God? Do you believe God loves you? If asked these two questions I would certainly say yes to both, so why all the hesitation?
Like those unwanted clouds on an otherwise sunny day, I have doubts that cast shadows on top of my faith.
“Jesus has a very special love for you. As for me, the silence and the emptiness is so great that I look and do not see, listen and do not hear…” (Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light)
Having read everything that Blessed Mother Teresa ever wrote, I was hesitant to read the collection of her letters that have been published as the book: Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light. This book discloses letters she wrote to certain people, letters that she wanted destroyed upon her death. These personal letters expose openly how she suffered periods of doubt about God.
I myself will openly admit to having wavering feelings of faithlessness. Heck, I might as well come full clean and state that usually these feelings of uncertainty come when faith is what I need most.
To realize that someone so Holy, so dedicated to caring and loving for the poorest of the poor may have had doubts, leads me to believe that none of us are exempt from experiencing the real test of faith, which is to prove that it is real.
For Blessed Mother Teresa to have carried this cross of silence for such a long time and still have the world look upon her in wonderment as she did what she set out to do only makes her more Holy in my mind’s eye. Whenever I think of her, I remember her courage, her inspiration, and her unconditional love that knew no bounds.
Her dark nights are no more. It is good to remember—the sky’s the limit.
Someone wise once said:
“Give yourself fully to God. He will use you to accomplish great things on the condition that you believe much more in His love than your weakness.”
(Photo credit courtesy of Rich O'Donnell)